~ABBA SHOWS UP~ (part 3 of "Abba Series")

[Praying]….Jesus, I pray that you would prepare the hearts of Nigel and Kim. They need you. I don’t know them, or much about them. Jesus, I just know their names. I pray that they would come next week, and that you would do a work in their hearts… Lord I also pray for….. Jen’s thoughts moved on toward the names of just a few others she remembered from the hot afternoon of canvassing for the upcoming Vacation Bible School.

VBS started off with the usual excitement….

Nigel and Kimberly entered our classroom that first evening for VBS. It took me until the next evening to realize they were siblings. After the Bible story in large group, all the children who had raised their hands (indicating their desire for counseling about salvation) went to the back. Nigel went back, and later told me that Jesus had washed his sins away! We were excited to hear of his decision, and hoped he had fully grasped what it meant to trust Jesus for salvation.

The next evening, I made my way to the back to help with counseling the children who wanted to speak with someone. I spoke with Isaiah. He understood and trusted Jesus. Nigel talking to another counselor. I was slightly worried that he had not understood that he was secure in Christ, there was no need to get “re-saved”. Isaiah and I finished talking and walked over to Nigel who was finished as well. As we walked, I asked him what he and the counselor had spoken about. Nigel’s words were full of confidence and fervor. He began to explain to me that once you accept Christ in your heart, Christ does a work in your heart. Nothing you could do, sin or action, could change what Jesus had done. “Because it was His work, not mine.” I listened in stunned silence. The counselor had obviously been in-tune with the Spirit, and the Spirit had granted a wonderful amount of understanding to Nigel.

I later realized that Nigel’s sister Kim had gone back to talk with someone as well. Nigel, Kim, and I were talking about all being “sisters and brothers” since we shared our Heavenly Father. Their faces of joy were simply beautiful. Nigel looked at me and said “Yeah, after Jesus washed my sins away last night, tonight, I told Kim to raise her hand and come talk to someone about it.” I almost laughed aloud at the innocence and beauty of Nigel’s fervor for his sister’s salvation. Under normal circumstances, a child telling another child to go back would be frowned upon. But in this instance, it was a beautiful display of the Spirits work in the brand-new child of God. The lady who counseled Kim told me that she was “ready, and understood”.

Fingers sticky from snow-cones, crumpled crafts, and changed hearts evidenced the week’s end. We all sat in the classroom, and some of the children seemed sad to see the week end, others seemed indifferent. Nigel and Kim’s driver came to the door and Nigel came and hugged Kaitlyn and I, then made his way around the room and gave every person a hug. Kim smiled as she hugged me goodbye. We said goodbye, and out the door they went. A minute had not passed when Nigel ran back into the room to hug us one more time. His eyes were sad as he told us he probably wouldn’t be able to come on Sundays, because his family attended another church. It was a sad moment; embracing yet another child for possibly the last time on this planet.

“Anyone can give a testimony Sunday night.” I reviewed the week in my mind. God had most definitely showed up. But I couldn’t think of anything concrete that I felt I could give a testimony about. As Saturday and Sunday went by, I went through the circumstance of God’s obvious work in Nigel’s heart. The service was full of testimonies of Abba’s love, faithfulness, and work in hearts. It was plain as day – Abba had showed up last week. His gentle fingerprints covered the circumstances.

After speaking I sat down, I hope that made sense to everyone. I had told about Nigel and Kim, and Isaiah – they were so obviously ripe for the harvest of God’s intervening grace.

Jen came up to me. Her face was animated and joyful….. “Natalie, I canvassed and knocked on Nigel and Kim’s door”… She told me how she had thought of Kim and Nigel many times before VBS and specifically prayed for them.

If you ever get the chance to share the Gospel, do it. If someone ever pops into your mind, pray for them. It’s obvious that God was part of the details of this story. It’s obvious that God had Jen knock on their door, remember their names, and pray for them. Its obvious that God had the perfect people counsel both Nigel and Kim. It’s obvious that Abba showed up.

~ABBA PURSUES~ (part 2 of "Abba Series")

"Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."

Matthew 11:28

He was numb. He was tired. He was still. Yet, there was a storm, an invisible storm -- of every evil, lie, pain, hurt and bitter thought swirling together into a tornado. His eyes were empty and cold, but under those eyes -- the storm. The storm had been awakened by this heartbreak of rejection and failure. He mechanically stood and walked down the stairs toward the kitchen. What am I doing? The thought of food makes me sick. He turned and saw the door. The door, his mind blocked the storm for enough time to remember a place. It was a summer evening, when there were fireflies and lemonade. His dad had walked in late and seemed troubled, yet resolute. All he could remember was being hastily put to bed, his dad tucking him in with extra care and hesitancy. The next morning dad was gone. The boy had heard the door close the night before. In the weeks, months, and years that followed, winds of pain, lies and bitterness blew into his heart. He captured the winds and held tightly to them. No one told him the winds lied. It’s my fault, I messed up, something is wrong with me, everyone will hurt me, I’ll never trust again. When the winds were strongest, he would crawl behind the clothes rack in his closet. It was dark and safe. He was alone, the door locked everyone but him and silence out. The silence heard his cries and sobs. The silence wasn’t afraid of the wind like everyone else in his life was. The silence did not comfort, but it did not fear or judge the winds. He began to feel that the winds had not ever been from the outside, but were from him. I’m sorry daddy, I’m sorry it was my fault…. As the years passed, a greater evil occurred. He became cold and numb and forgot about the pain. He felt nothing. He didn’t lose his emotions, but he lost his relational connection. I had trusted and ruined everything…. Mom never talked to him about him leaving. She remained silent on the subject, instead, she obsessed about his education, little league, and social life.

Now here he was. A man. Staring at the door. The silence would listen, the winds had been silent for so many years, nothing could rouse them, they were buried so deep in his being. Now This had somehow cut through it all and awakened the beast. He wanted to run, to go back to the closet where he was safe. Yet here he stood in his apartment, mom had moved out of the old house three years back. The closet is where you go when you were little…. How was it that he felt like that little boy? The return of the winds seemed to transport him back. He walked to the front door and grasped the handle, his friends would be partying tonight. He could leave, or he could face the winds that he had once embraced than denied. He could ask the winds “why”, and ask his heart “what.”. He could face the buried winds that had began to blow. He would leave silence out of the loop this time. He remembered what he had read the night before… “Come unto me all ye that weary and heavy laden….” When he looked up, he heard his True and Faithful Father say…. “come to me…..” there was yearning and deep compassion and love that drew with strong cords the heart of the little boy. He somehow knew that to deny the call of His father would cost him years, he closed his eyes grasped the hand and jumped into the abyss……. As he looked up he knew, there was more than silence in that closet…..The Pursuer had been there. Time passed, he looked back and saw - The One that had once spoke truth and peace to the winds and waves- had spoken again. His True and Faithful Father didn’t judge or ignore the winds, He faced the winds and told the winds they were wrong. Even better, He told the boy’s heart that he was a precious child beloved of an ever-faithful Abba.

~ABBA SINGS~ (first in 3 part "Abba Series")

The LORD thy God in the midst of thee [is] mighty; he will save, he will rejoice over thee with joy; he will rest in his love, he will joy over thee with singing. (KJV)

He will exult over you with loud singing. (ESV)

~Zephaniah 3:17~

It was early. To early. I opened my eyes and felt the wave of "this bed is comfortable, go back to sleep" soak into me. I closed my eyes and sighed. I loved lying in bed doing nothing. What's today, where am I, what am I doing? The questions floated in my mind. I drift off. Than I awake with a start. Get up! Oh yes, I was planning on waking at a decent hour. True, I didn't have to DO anything until 11. Hear I was in a strange place. I had been so busy the past two weeks, my time with God had been a rushed. "I need you Jesus, Thank you for being with me." I was feeling the absence of my conversation and communion with my Lord.

I got dressed, packed my bag and ate something. Then out the door. As I strolled down the gravel lane I talked to God, confessing my lack of attention to our relationship.

Through the dewy field I walked, my feet were drenched in the moisture of the grass. I exulted in the morning sun's warmness, and the sounds of creation. I looked down at the river, it was misty. I enjoyed the sounds, sights and smells of Gods creation as I usually would. As I swung back in forth on the rope swing, it's gentle sway went with my swaying song on praise.

For some reason I thought of the verse that says God sings over his children. Visions of a father holding his little child and singing songs about her; how she is lovely and special, and how she will grow into a great women.The vision of a mother holding her child, singing in a soft voice, singing her love. Or a van bumping down the road, the family singing a made-up song about the family, the children's names being named. The children laugh and beam as the silly song mentions their name.

My mind came back to my conversation with God. As I talked to my Father, my mind and heart asked. Abba, do you sing over me?

It seemed too special and presumptuous to think the Lord of creation would stoop so low, as to sing over me. Yet, somehow I dared to ask in childlike faith; Do you rejoice over me?

As I listened, I heard it. It was as if God opened my ears. In the soft swish of the grass he whispered his compassion. The swift clear current spoke of his purity and power. The breeze blew a strand of hair across my face. The distinct call of birds in the line of trees. All of these sounds were expressing the delight the Creator has for his child. You are my child, I AM your Father. When Jesus speaks to your heart, there is not doubt that he has spoken, he has a way of showing us his love and glory in such as way that all the child's heart can do is simply delight in the His incredible glory and faithfulness. Words are inadequate to say thank you or even sing praise. It is as if the distance between God and man is seen, and in he same moment the closeness of the Father and his Child. It is humbling beyond words, why does the Almighty Creator care enough to sing, and let me hear his songs….His songs of love and rejoicing in the wind and rippling currents. Yes, The Father sings over his children. He sings over me.

Epilogue: I wrote this Summer 2009 during my two week stay in Maryland where I worked at a camp. God truly is good to his children.